American Idiots
by Himawari-no-Ichizoku
Summary: What do you get when you place two American, trouble making, idiotic, young girls into Ouran? A comedic Hell. Love? Angered yellow cow? A burnt up yellow banana suit? Who said all blonds where dumb? "Why are there no black people?" M for strong language
1. Chapter 1

"Speaking."

_'Thoughts.'_

**"When Utau and Chey say something at the same time."**

**"When the twins say something at the same time."**

**~oOo(crOwn)oOo~**

"The prestigious school for the rich and beautiful stood grand and tall. Towering over all."

"Well hey! That rhymed!"

"Ouran High School. It threatens all of the lower classes. Intimidates them. Telling them they suck and won't go far in life... Only people with enough motivation, smarts, and not to mention money, can get in." A emo-looking, short*****, fluffy black haired girl with dark almost black eyes that seemed to be swirled with a beautiful shade of green continued to narrate, ignoring her friends comment.

"...Then how did WE get in ******Chey-nay-nay?" asked her bubbly blonde haired, emerald eyed companion, her head tilted in (slight) confusion.

Sweat dropping the fluffy one's head turned to her best friend, "I have no fucking clue how I got in, Utau. No fucking clue. But YOU completely understand." Chey-nay-nay, or *******Chey started to walk from their spot by the gate and towards the school. Which was more then likely the size of a small house or apartment complex.

"And why is it pink of ALL colors? PINK! Why not brown? Or white?" Utau asked while catching up, and making sure to put hatred into the damned disgusting color.

"Maybe..." Chey started to say, but was interrupted when Utau's blonde brain finally received what her friend said.

"WAIT!" Utau yelled, making Chey stop.

"What do you mean you understand how I got in?" The blonde one asked, glaring and pointing like at Chey like the closet monkey in Family Guy.

Sweat dropping once more Chey gave Utau a small smile, "Well you may act like an air head and a blonde,"

"Hey!...I am a blonde..." Utau pouted with her arms folded across her chest. Making her look rather cute.

"And you may be a dumb ass,"

At that the airheaded, dumb ass, blonde glared daggers at her friends.

Chey just smirked at that and continued walking with the 'airhead' right behind her.

"But your extreamly smart. Idiot. You have a eidetic memory. Your like, no, ARE a fucking genius! Smarter then Einstein! Hell, for all we know you could be Yoda's reincarnation!" She exclaimed waving her hands in the air as she started running around in crazy, makeshift circles.

All her praise made Utau slightly blush. "B-b-but your smart too! Your really smart too!"

Scoffing Chey grab her hand and pulled her to the school.

"Yeah? Well compared to you I look like a damned..."

But she didn't get to complete her sentence before the sound of high-pitched excited screams broke the air.

"What the..." Utau started.

"Hell," Chey continued.

**"Is that?"** They both said whilst looking at each other in utter confusion.

Shrugging they followed the screeches with interest. Soon they found themselves staring at a heard of yellow buffalos with six extremely handsome men and...a girl? Dressed in the males uniform? What the...well...Chey didn't have much room to talk. She was fine in men clothing too. They seemed to be just hanging out and talking to the guys...outside...under a huge white tent...like the ones you see at outdoor weddings. It had vines dripping of it, holding passion flowers of all kinds. They got closer, trying to see what all the commotion was about. In order to get a slightly better view the two climbed a tree to sit on a low hanging branch that had the perfect view of the show.

From what they could tell they girls were swooning due to the fact that two auburn haired, golden eyed twins were holding each other Their lips that close to touching.

That close.

Others were fawning over a cute little blondie with the most adorable brown eyes. He was spinning around while throwing a stuffed pink bunny high into the air. just as the bunny was about to land in some random cake (to the two it appeared out of nowhere) a tall black haired and dark eyed man caught the rabbit and gave it to -the now suddenly on the verge of tears- blond. He patted the small ones head in reassurance. Making the buffalo squeal, and the blonde happy again.

"What the..." Utau once again repeated.

"Fuck" Chey ended, changing the obscene word.

**"Is going on?"** the both ended...again...but slightly different then the last time.

Going on with the observing the saw the milk chocolate haired and eyed girl serving tea her group of ladies. Who, by the way, where all blushing madly with unnatural hearts in their eyes.

Next was another tall, but not as tall as the other..., black haired pepper eyed man. How seemed to be observing everything as well, for he had a black binder. For some reason he caught the girls eye. Or, when It came to Chey, his binder.

**"Dude,"** They said, turning their heads to each other in excitement. Joker like grins plastered across their faces.

"I think he as a Death Note!" They giigles. Their grins, if possible, grew even bigger at the thought.

As they were trying to figure out how to see if it was really a Death Note four words caught their attention.

**"Lets play a game!"**

At that all their attention was on the auburn twins. Who were posing in front of their little cluster of yellow cows...*cough cough*...ladies...

**"The 'Which one is Hikaru' game."**

"Hmmm..." Mused Chey.'

"So thats their names huh." Utau stated more then asked as she laid down on the branch, kicking her legs in the are while her hands held up her head. If she had a tail it would be swishing back and forth.

Suddenly the two grinned Cheshire Cat grins.

"Hey U-U?" Chey mischievously purred.

"Yes?" She answered, her eyes still on the scene of the ladies wondering who was who.

"Want to play to?"

"Hehe," Utau giggle cutely as she sat up, crisscrossing her legs and placing her hands in her lap and looked at Chey, "Sure!"

Taking a deep breath and cupping their hands over their mouths Utau yelled first,

"Hey Kaoru! You have a spider on your head!"

Then Chey second, "Hikaru, you fucking bastard! You owe me money!"

Everyone under the tent stopped what they where doing to look towards the area where the believed the absence language came from. What they saw where two figures covered by a shadow sitting in a tree.

Kaoru started to swat at his head, panicking and yelling for someone to get it off. While his twin turned to the tree and yelled at the figures.

"I do not owe you money! I don't know who the hell you are!" He then turned to his brother, grabbed his hand, pulled him close, and titled his head up to look at him. "And there is no spider, Kaoru, so calm down. Kay?" He slightly whispered, but made sure he was loud enough for everyone to hear.

Going along with the act Kaoru looked away and blushed. "I'm sorry, Hikaru. Thank you."

Just as the girls where about tho forget the rude interruption laughter filled the air. Everyones eyes returned to the trees.

"Okay...so that ones Kaoru and that ones Hikaru. I think I can remember that. You?" Utau said as she looked at her hardly-breathing-due-to-the-laughter-and-the-pain-caused-by-the-laughter Friend.

A amused voice was heard over the seemingly nonstop laughter. Causing the girls and the twins to fume in anger. You could practically see the steam coming out of their ears. Maybe several bombs went of inside each of their heads? This just caused Chey to laugh harder. If that was humanly possible.

Hikaru and Kaoru turned to each other and eyed one of the cans of commoner sodia they were drinking. The smirked. Dumped out the remaining contents and set their plan into action.

"HEY!" Kaoru shouted.

"LOOK OUT!" Hikaru shouted too.

**"Huh?"** Both girls turned around just in time to see something shiny flying towards them. Before any of them could react the can whizzed past Utau, creating a breeze that made her long locks fly everywhere when suddenly...

**_BAM!_**

"Gah!"

The can impacted with Chey's forehead, sending her slowly falling backwards, anime style, out of the tree.

"Ahh! Chey!" Utau jumped out of the and kneeled down at the girls side.

"Hey Chey, CHEY! Speak to me! Hey are you okay?"

"...nah...Pretty bird eaten startz." Was the only response she could get out of her.

"Oh." Utau said in surprise, but then she smiled. "Good to see your swell then."

She then started to poke at the growth that was forming on her friends forehead with interest...and with a stick.

"Oi!" A voice said from behind them.

Utau turned around to see the two twins smirking evilly at them, yet, with some slight anger and amusement.

"Who the hell,"

"Are you two?"

Standing up Utau could see that everyone, and I mean EVERYONE was behind them. Either very angry, amused, confused or neutral.

Utau was about to answer when she felt a hand cover her mouth and nose and another snake around her chest.

"None of your damn business."

_'Hmm...apparently Chey got ahold of her self.'_ Utau thought, while trying to look at Chey from the corners of her eyes. 'And boy does she look mad." You could basically see the black aura around her. It just screamed murder. '_...wait...why can't I...?!'_

All the angered cows quickly turned fearful and hid behind the hosts.

"I think it does make it our business," Kaoru stated.

"If you owe us a apology." Hikaru ended.

It seemed not one noticed the poor blonde struggling against the hands covering the only places that allowed air to get into her lungs.

"An apology? For what? If I recall correctly it is YOU two idiotic dip shits that owe US an apology for kicking a fucking can at us!" Chey stated to yell at the ones who angered her. "For all I care you two can go fu..." She dropped her own sentence. Her eyes grew to the size of plates, and her pupils the size of a pea. Her face showed nothing but pure disgust.

"UGGGG!" She suddenly whipped her hand away from mouth of the almost purple Utau and shoved her a a confused Kaoru.

"Fuck! What the hell was that for! You licked my hand. What? You suddenly have a hand fetish? You butt-munch!" Chey yelled at Utau as she was held her hand, furiously trying to find something to whip the saliva off it. She spotted a sweating dropping, slightly confused and disgusted, yet amused Hikaru looking at his younger brother who was trying to stop the blonde girl from passing out. Spotting the evil look his new found tormenter was giving him he started to back away, pointing at the fluffy, black haired girl as she extended her hand, a sigh that she intended to use him as her own personal towel.

~Let the games from hell begin!~

* * *

><p><strong>*AN~ Short as in hair in short. Fluffy as in hair is fluffy. You know how peoples hair look fluffy and feathery and...yeah...**

****Chey-nay-nay is pronounced 'Shade' without the 'de' so its 'Sha' or if you watch the second lord and master Shane Dawnson you know how its pronounced...Yo! Name is Shanaynay!**

*****...Again... Chey is now pronounced Shai or Shy...**


	2. Chapter 2

"Speaking."

_'Thoughts.'_

**"When Utau and Chey say something at the same time."**

**"When the twins say something at the same time."**

**~oOo(Of)oOo~**

"Run Forest! RUN" Utau shouted at Chey as they where sprinting to the school. Not running, sprinting.

"What the hell do you think I'm doing! You dumb ass!" Chey shouted back.

**"This is all your fault!"** They both harmonized while pointing accusingly at each other, and running. No wait. Sprinting.

**"Mine?"** They said in anger and shock. It was sooo obvious it was the others fault...

"Yea!" Chey started, "If you weren't going to tell those damn Gingers are names, none of this be happening. Therefor its YOUR FAULT!" She said, all the while pointing behind them to the stampeding angry yellow cows. Lead by even more pissed off ginger bulls.

"Haha!" Utau forced a fake laugh, "If you didn't try to kill me back there we wouldn't be running for are lives!" She turned her blond head to their soon to be murderers. Looking ahead, they where so close to safety. So close. "And I wasn't going to tell them are names. I was gong to speak to them in Latin. Hopefully to confuse them! Thus, this is all your fault!" She said as they kicked open the school doors and started looking around the castle like school looking for the office.

Now why are our dear idiots being chased?

**_Flashback_**

"N-n-no." Hikaru stuttered, "S-s-stay back! You creeper" He was trying to back away from the evilly grinning Chey. She had her arm outstretched, and threatened to drag her drool covered hand across his shirt, or hair which ever was the easiest to reach when the right moment came.

"Kaoru! Get him away from me!" He hollered to his otherwise confused twin. Who was busy trying to calm down they now crying, long haired blond.

_'Him?'_ Chey thought, _'Do I really look that much like a fucking dude? Sure, what I'm wearing isn't exactly feminine...If you call wearing a baggy black hoodie, with baggy dark green, worn out jeans, black Nikes, a blue almost black Fedora hat not...exactly...never mind..But I AM wearing makeup. Mascara! Plus my voice! I'm pretty sure it isn't deep enough to even be CONSIDERED a mans... Oblivious dumb asses.'_

"Help! How?" Kaoru yelled back, "I'm trying to help _him_," He gestured to a slightly hyperventilating Utau, "calm down so we can get back at them for playing such a cruel joke!"

Chey sweat dropped at his comment.

_'How can _**anyone**_ mistake Utau for a guy! For gods sake she's wearing more feminine clothing then I am!'_

Utau was dressed in a Bird Nouveau Puffed Sleeve Gauze black shirts with jeans. Well...she DID have on a almost equally baggy blackish-gray hoodie...

_'But her face AND voice is 100% female!'_ Chey thought shocked beyond belief at everyones stupidity,_ 'Fucking, dumb ass, oblivious rich bastards.'_

Seeing an opening sense the twins were occupied she lunged for her friends shirt collar and yanked her told herself. Making sure to wipe her hand free of slobbery drool on her hoodie in the process.

"Excuse us," Chey hissed at the momentarily dazed twins, her fluffy bangs almost covering her black outlined eyes. She then freed Utau.

"But we weren't playing a joke." Utau finished, still slightly flushed from her lack of air.

**"We were simply playing the, 'Which one is Hikaru' game!'"** They said, striking the same pose the two did earlier.

**"Huh?"** The twins asked dumbly.

"We were playing the game," Utau said cheerfully. Clasping her hands together in front of her, ruining the pose the two where in.

"Oh and what a fun game it was." The blond then stared at the sky dreamily.

"Psshh. Dumb ass gingers." Chey scoffed, her face turned away from the twins, her arms crossed over her chest.

This created an tick mark on Hikaru's head. A.K.A...

It pissed him off.

"What...did you say?"

Smirking, Chey faced the angered twin and said, "Oh, I'm sorry. Didn't you here me? What I said was," but she cut her self short as she dodged a fist aimed for her face. She ended knocking Utau into Kaoru, again.

The poor soul.

Who this time instinctively wrapped his arms around her "upper body." Giving him a good feel of what was underneath her oversized hoodie.

_'What?_' Kaoru questioned to himself, _'His chest feels different the a guys...'_

This incident caused a wide eyed Utau to scream. And at the same time both girls turned to face the closest twin. Chey turned to Hikaru and Utau turned to Kaoru. They swung back their legs and, at the same time, aimed and kicked the unfortunate hosts right where the sun don't shine.

The twig and berries.

The family jewels.

The marble sacks.

The coin purse.

The giblets.

The Huevos.

Their fucking balls.

**_Flashback end_**

Seeing not one but two of their beloved hosts being attacked and hit in the most delicate, painful spot by two thugs for absolutely no reason what so ever (as the cows thought) angered the cows. Thus! The girls current predicament.

"I see it! I see the light Chey!" Utau suddenly announced, giving up and or forget their little augment for the mean time. She was pointing straight ahead. Sparkles of happiness where flying everywhere

"The office!" Chey exclaimed.

And together the reached their safe haven. Until the next day...where all was to begin again with some odd twists here and there.

* * *

><p><strong>So thats that for now. I didn't know how else to get the twin kicked...down their...but for some reason I REALLY wanted to have that happen to them.<strong>

**Hope you all enjoyed it! Please review! Tell me what you think.**

**Any question, comments, concerns, haikus or poems? Contact my lawyer...Haruhi.**

**Question of the day! Answer truthfully!**

**~If an ambulance is on its way to save someone, and it runs someone over, does it stop to help them?**


	3. Chapter 3

**HEY HEY HEY! Its me again! Thanks for reading/favoriting/alerting and thanks to Heartnett for being the first reviewer! XD And for that I'll give you back your head. *bows and presents head with a little red bow.***

**Sorry if there are any misprints or erros. Every time I upload a chapter the computer, FF or both screw something up. Like they delete something or...i don't kow. They screw it up. So I try to re-revise it as best as I can before my mom can take the computer...it is hers...but that doesn't mean she can read my stories and revise (sensors) it...**

**This story is just pure randomness i believe...I don't know. The story comes to me at school. So I became a female Kyouya and I now carry a note book where ever I go. I write everything down in that stupid thing. EVERYTHING. Peoples habits, who's dating who's...I have become a flippen stalker in a period of a week! DX**

**AND ITS ALL OF YOUR FALUT! *point to computer***

**Rated M for crude language, and pervertedness...possibly. Thats my friends job. Who doesn't have a fanfiction. We share the notebook...over the internet...how we do things is very complex. Don't likely, don't read-e. And if you find some kind of offense here then...**

**GET. **

**THE. **

**FUCK. **

**OFF. **

**THE. **

**INTERNET!**

**Also! I forgot to mention (dumbass...) that this takes place sometime after the anime. Mori and Hunny are in college and I don't see myself going into that -...hmmm...- but they will visit the host club now and then. (If I remember.) The twins and Haruhi are second years and are in class 2-A. I believe I made that up. Kyouya and Tamaki are in class 3-A. I haven't had a chance to buy the manga or search for it online, so...I don't know...anything...after the anime... -_-"**

**This story is made manly for my friends, who will understand a lot of the "humor" that resides in here. I wonder who thinks they will understand some of our funniness, and stupidity...hmmmmm...*evil,(random), smile***

**Disclaimer: If I owned OHSHC the anime would be longer, Hunny would lose Usa-chan more often, the twins would "accidentally" kiss each other, and I would give Mori something...rather...ummmm..."special"...to make him more...talkative or lively. All in ONE episode. That would be more like a 3 hour movie. SO all in all...I DO NOT OWN! (sadly...bummer.)**

"Speaking"

'_Thoughts.'_

"_**When Utau and Chey say something at the same time."**_

"_**When the twins say something at the same time."**_

**~oOo(AwEsOmEnSs)oOo~**

The next day.

Utau and Chey's Apratment.

5:oo am.

The two teens were starting dumbly at the two packages' they just opened. They revived their uniforms at the school the day before. AFTER they lost the mob that was running after them with pitch forks, flames, and murder in their eyes.

So they kicked two guys in the balls. Who the flubber-nuts cared?

Apparently half of the female population at that strange ass school...

Apparently the girls that began the chase called, texted, or telepathically contacted their friends inside and outside the school. For as the duo were running around franticly in search for the office girls were literally raining from the ceiling and going threw the walls to join the pointless chase.

But don't fret.

Our dimwits where able to find the office in one piece. Get their schedules, and uniforms, and since they enjoyed living for the most part they took a virtual tour around the school.

THANK THE LORD JESUS FOR HOLOGRAPHS!

Now back to the girls apartment, where they JUST now opened their uniforms.

Just hours before school was to start.

What fun!

...Yeeeeaaaahhhh riiiiggghhhtttt...

"What the,"

"Hell,"

**"Are those?**" Utau and Chey said in unison. Tilting their heads to the side, a look of utter horror and yet confusion were plastered onto both of their faces.

"Their yellow." Utau said, cold yet emotionlessly. She was glaring at the things in front of them with so much hatred. A "normal" person would more the likely burst and disappear in flames under five seconds and reappear in hell.

"Dresses." Was all Chey said, monotoned and with no emotion as well. For she was in shock. She did not wear dresses. Her eyes where covered by her hair as she looked down at the ground.

"Pink school, yellow uniforms."

"Dresses."

You could practically see the darker then black aura infused with a scary shade of purple engulfing the two. The temperature went down drastically. So drastically that their down stairs neighbor's cat started to grow icicles in its nose. The poor thing. It took hours for them to thaw it out.

**"They'll make us look like banana's in a colorful fruit bowl surrounded by a bunch of selfish rich blueberries..."** They said together.

Anger rising, and flames of hell appearing behind her almost randomly, Utau ran to the kitchen. (More like teleported.) She ripped open a gray tin container that was placed next to the fridge, and grabbed one of their most cherished and most favorited toys.

Their beloved lighter.

O.O

Oh holy crap.

Two teen girls...

Who seem to be in a pissed off mood...

With a lighter...

Well shit!

WE ALL BETTER RUN LIKE NARAKU OBTAINED THE COMPLETED SHIKON JEWEL! Call Kagome!

**(A/N Stupid inside joke #515. Yes. Yes we have number are inside jokes. Don't laugh. It isn't nice.)**

It had hand drawn decorations on both sides.

On one side were happy-go-lucky green smiling frogs with green (smiling) lilly pads, holding blue and purple flowers...Like what the fuck?

And on the other side...

Kick-ass flames surrounding what looked like a girl with a torn up, dirty white dress, splattered with fresh and dried blood, and holding a scythe, that was dripping with blood...Holy shit.

Do not assume who's is who's...for you will get it wrong... **._.**

She ran (teleported) back to the living room to where her roommate and the...the...THINGS resided. But upon seeing the time, their plan would have to be delayed. In fear that the THINGS would go on a rampage and destroy their new home they packed them along with their other school stuff. And dressed in what they wore the pervious day.

Chey was wearing her baggy blackhoodie, baggy dark green, worn out jeans, black Nikes, and a blue-ish black Fedora hat. Utau was wearing a Bird Nouveau Puffed Sleeve Gauze (what ever that is...) black shirt with jeans, and a baggy blackish-gray hoodie. Except this time she had an extra "accessory." A white case, bigger then a guitar case, was strapped to her shoulder.

Then they started running,

NO.

SPRINTING...

Towards their new school.

(joy)

**~oO0Oo~ Class 2-A**

"Hey Hikaru, Kaoru, would you like anything?" A overly concerned fan-girl asked the twins. Who (by the orders of the Shadow King!) had slings on their arms and cast on their legs. Something to do with injured lovinng brothers bringing in more of a profit from worried, overly obsessed fan-girls...

"A pillow and blanket would be nice, we feel very tired all of a sudden." Kaoru, posing as Hikaru, said.

"I think we might be coming down with small, harmless illness, ladies. You might not want to be so close to us." Hikaru, posing as Kaoru, finished. He added a "little" cough (hack) at the end for extra effect. He then buckled over with the "force of the cough."

"Ah! Kaoru! Kaoru!" -the real Kaoru hobbled as fast as he could to his brother, who someone got on the other side of the class room...strange, I could of sworn I placed him not even a foot from his brother...- "Are you okay? Speak to me!"

"Hikaru...is that you? I-I-I can't see a thing...what...Grandmama? Is that you? I thought you were dead? What a beautiful light you have behind you."

They weren't even able to finish their act when they were both hit upside the head by their favorite pass time...

Haruhi.

Who had a pulsing anger mark placed ontop of her head and her right eye was twitching uncontrollably. She barely had any sleep last night due to last nights insane thunder storm, and frankly, she wasn't in any mood to deal with so much noise this early in the morning.

"Stop posing as Hikaru," -she pointed to Karou,- "and stop posing as Karou,"- she pointed to Hikaru,- "and why are you both wearing slings and casts! They didn't do anything to those parts of you body!"

"Haruhi," The real Hikaru said in a faked whimper.

**"I can't believe you would accuse US of faking our injuries to help the Shadow King rake in more money for the club." **The auburn twins replied in unison.

"I did nothing of the sorts." Haruhi replied deadpanned.

Just then the bell rang, signaling the beginning of homeroom, and the teacher walked in as they all sat down. The twins getting rid of their confinements.

"All right class! Today we have a new transfer from America joining us so be nice," -he turned towards the door,- "You may come in now!"

And in walked the transfer student, who was dressed in baggy commoners clothing. He had tangled, short curly midnight hair, and beautiful yet threatening black eyes that were swirled with the perfect shade of green.

"Class this is Chey Sota, this is Class." The teacher said smiling.

Chey turned to face the silent class, all eyes were on her. And apparently all eyes remembered her. For they did nothing but glare hatefully at her.

Every single pair of eyes.

Glared at her.

_'Oh look! Doe eyes (Haruhi) is just staring at me with curiosity and...what is that? Pity! What the hell did I do to deserve...oh...yeah...that. Wait! Did he just say ...stupid rich bastards.'_ Chey thought looking over the class with a deadpanned yet somehow cold expression.

The teacher coughed, "Well?"

Chey turned towards the teacher with a bored as hell expression.

Sweat dropping he continued, "Aren't you going to say hello?"

"He probably doesn't know how to speak Japanese."

"The lowly commoner."

"How could someone like him get into this school?"

"His filth is going to contaminate our school!"

The class "whispered" amongst themselves.

Eye twitching and temper rising she said the nicest thing she could think of. She stood straight and tall and brought her hand to her head in a salute.

"Good mornin you selfish, rich, arrogant, blind, overly pampered bastards! It is a pleasure to ruin your overly pink, waste of space castle with my kick-ass filth!"

She then brought her hand down to pull down her right eye lid as she closed her left and stuck out her tongue.

_'I wonder if I'll be able break my record of "The Fastest Time to get into Detention on the First Day of attending a New School." ...'_ Chey though as she smirked at the class and headed to the only open seat...which...just her luck...was placed in the middle of the room.

Gasps were heard throughout the room.

"Such vulgar language!"

"How dare that arrogant commoner speak to us like that!"

"We'll show him!"

Chey just grinned at all the commotion she caused. For some reason this made the school day almost worth the separation from Utau. It made her happy. So happy she didn't notice the two sets of auburn haired twins glaring at her sitting behind her.

**Okay Chappy the Rabbit number three is finished! I am working on number four. Sorry I haven't updated I went to DC for school I have a Poetry Project due, a Science project due, a Math project due, and I have to read two books by the end of this week, and my computer hates me...**

**Pray for my survival.**

**Hope you liked!**

**Tell me what you thought!**

**Questions, comments concerns, haikus, or poems? Review or PM me.**

**The answer for last times Question of the Day...I have NO clue.**

**Question of the Day. Answer Truthfully! If you were a genie and a person asked you this wish, "I wish you would not grant me this wish", what would you do?**


	4. Chapter 4

**Yo! I am happy! You wanna know why? Of course you don't! XD But I'ma tellin ya anyways! Its because of my awesome Favoriters, Alerters, Reviewers, and Readers! I loves ya all! I love ya! *cackles* **

**Also! I SURVIVED!**

***cough, cough* Anyways...Thank you.**

**GLOB! My computer won't stop messing up my chapters! *crys a river***

**Come one! Stupid Mac! I thought I hated Dell!**

**ON WITH Z STOR-A! **

"Speaking"

_'Thoughts.'_

**"When Utau and Chey say something at the same time."**

**"When the twins say something at the same time."**

**~oOo(aNd)oOo~**

Class 3-A

Utau.

_'Why do they have to split us up!'_ Our Blondie thought to her self as she walked down the long, seemingly endless hall ways to her classroom. Hall ways which she already remembered. So she knew her way around the school like it was the back of her hand.

_'And why do I have to be placed a year ahead of her! It's not fair!'_ As she turned the corner she saw a sigh with her class room number...letter...thingy.

**3-A.**

Stopping, she took a deep, shaky breath and adjusted the strap of her over sized guitar case and opened the door.

Instantly the class room quieted.

She could feel the glares and stares of realization and hated on her already.

She didn't like being stared at. It brought back...unwanted...memories.

She walked towards the teachers desk, never once looking at the students who glared at her for hurting one of there beloved host or were just plan old staring. Trying to figure out why such a strange specimen was in there class room, let alone there play house *cough,cough* excuse me, school.

"Yes, how may I help you?" The teacher said with distaste as he looked down at her. Utau looked straight into his eyes with her brilliant emerald ones. This caused the teacher and all the students to blush.

Everyone.

Including the blond sporting violet eyes and the midnight eyed and haired, glasses wearing young men sitting in the center of the room. The blond was thinking what a wonderful addition the new commoner would be to the host clubs little family while glasses was writing away in his notebook about god knows what. You could barely see the blush he had on. He was so good at hiding the few blushes he had, but this one showed just barley.

"Hey Kyoya?"-The blond whispered his friend, who's name seems to be Kyoya. Who just 'hmmm' in response.-"I think he would make a perfect addition in our club. But he does seem familiar doesn't he?" Kyoya then took the time to look at the commoner again

"I'm one of the knew transfer students from America. Umi, Utau." -She said as she bowed. He long hair falling lightly and delicately over he shoulders. She then got out of her bow and slowly and shyly looked over the students out of the corner of her eye. Seeing as they were no longer glaring at her but just staring with awe and...lust (for reasons she didn't really understand, and quite frankly, she didn't want to understand them). She then turned, bowed again, and spoke to the class. Seeing as the teacher was trying his best to suppress a bloody nose. But was failing miserably.

The hentai.

"Pleased to meet you all."

"W-w-well class." -The teach stuttered with tissue plugging up his nose, making him sound strange and stuffy.- "Any questions for our new classmate?"

Instantly everyone's hands shot up. Well minus Kyoya's. But you couldn't really tell with everyone frantically waving.

_'But I don't wanna!'_ Utau whimpered in her head. She hated being questioned. It...unsettled her to no end. But before she could say something similar to what she was thinking a familiar blond stood up and spoke.

_'Shiz paste and crackers! Its one of the guys from yesterday!...Oh look! It's Kira and his Death Note! Cool! I wonder if I can take...a peek.'_

"Utau-kun, Utau-kun!" -A random girl called- "How old are you"

"Ahhh...I just turned 15."

Apparently this shocked the whole class (minus a certain someone).

"EHHHH!" They all exclaimed.

"Why are you in our class then?"

"Ano...I...um..." -Utau blushed and avoided all eyes by looking at her shoes, while fiddling with her shirt. Thus, making everyone blush again.-"I have a...IQ of...I have a growing IQ of...My IQ is...slightly...higher then one hundred and eighty?"

"WHAT!"

"So, that makes you a genius?"

"SOOOO COOL!"

All the commotion and random complements made Utau blush harder and sweat drop at the same time as everyone (guys, teacher, and all...) squealed loudly.

"Wait!"-Some hyperactive blond interrupted enthusiastically- "So are you a boy or a girl. And why are you wearing such ghastly commoner clothing when you could wear our lovely outfits? And if your a guy, do you mind joining our Host Club?"

This question caught the girl off guard, it also irked her beyond human comprehension.

Her hair covered her eyes in a ominous way.

The room became very cold very quickly.

Everyone shivered. Whether it was from fear or the random cold was unknown.

Sudden the new student spoke. But it wasn't in the way s/he did before.

Oh no.

S/he spoke in a voice that could literally stab you and then kill you if given the chance to do so.

"Seriously." Her voice was dripping with anger. Pushing everyone to the back of the classroom to cower in fear.

Besides Kyoya.

Who sat there in his seat with great interest even if he didn't show it, it was there).

Scribbling away in his notebook of never end knowledge...of some kind.

Typical Kyoya.

"You can't tell whether I'm a boy or girl, huh?" Utau asked in a almost demonic tone of voice. It sent un-pleasurable chills up every bodies spin.

"My name doesn't give you a big enough clue, huh? Wow. And here I thought a majority of Americans were ignorant idiots. Guess I was wrong. And why would I join a club I know nothing about, huh? How stupid can you all be?" By now Utau was shaking with anger. Hundreds and thousands of blood red, pulsing, anger marks were appearing all over her person.

Just as she was about to let the world know what world war three would be and feel like the bell rang and she snapped out of it.

"Oh!"-She said suddenly in the happy voice she had at first, clapping her hands together, and tilting her head to the side. She had a shinning smile on. Making the classroom warm once more, and everyone blush, yet freeze in fear and utter shock.- "First period!"

And she skipped out of the room humming a tune of the unknown.

Leaving everyone dumbstruck.

At her sudden change of mood.

Everything, everyone was quite.

Until...

"Awwww...we still don't know Utau's gender." A girl whined as a others few squealed.

"Sooo cool!"

"I hope he'll join the host club, that is if he is a he and not a she. But I hope he's a he so I can spend time with him. But if hes a she then I'll befreind her..."

"I hope Utau's a girl."

"Yeah, then I'll be able to stare into those eyes as long as I wanted to (and probably a little bit more)."

"But what if he is a he and not a she?"

"Does that make you gay?"

"...I...I don't know...WAIT! Why just me? Wouldn't take make all of us gay?"

Kyoya and Tamaki just looked at each other. Even if Tamaki was dense, and he didn't know what gender Haruhi was when they the first meet, he could tell exactly what gender Umi, Utau was. He decided to strike a pose and announce it.

"Utau's gender is know obvious to me." Everyone put all their attention on him. Even if they were late for class. Kyoya on the other hand sighed almost inaudibly.

"Utau is one hundred percent male!"

Yup.

Tamaki's not just dense. But stupid.

All the girls 'yeahed' and all the guys 'awwed' ("Damn it! does this still make us gay?"), Kyoya just sweet dropped at his best friends and classmates arrogance and...well...stupidity. He then got up from his seat to leave the class room, with Tamaki skipping along right behind him and out into the hall way to their next class.

Now, down the hall, to the right...then take a left, then up, then down, horizontal, another left, spin around, touch the ground... is were we find our Utau.

With a grin of pure mischief plastered onto her face.

_'I guess this school will be fun and worth it! Arrogant rich people seem to be amusing!' _She mused in her head.

She then giggled out loud. "This should be fun!"

If she was (were?) paying any attention to her surroundings she would of been able to tell she was no longer alone in the long hall way. Tamaki was silently holding on to a annoyed Kyoya for dear life.

"H-hey M-mommy dear?"

Sighing Kyoya answered, "Yes, 'Daddy' dear?"

"Doesn't he kind of remind you of those shaddy twins and Hunny-senpai mixed into one for some reason?" Tamaki asked.

"I don't see how 'he' resembles them in anyway." Kyoya answered, while pushing up his glasses, the light reflecting off of them, hiding his eyes form sight. But he did see how 'he' reminded his friend of Hunny-senpai. But he highly doubted, no, he knew for a fact, that Tamaki knew ANYTHING about the new transfer student. Especially since he believed that she was actually a he. It was the Haruhi incident all over again.

**Okay...ya...very mellow...little humor...I know.**

**Utau will only curse when provoked. 'Kay?**

**Not as entertaining either...I KNOW!**

**Utaus no fun without her fellow idiot on her side... T-T...sad... I KNOW!**

**I just kind of had to get that out of the way.**

**Don't get offended because of the America joke. You all know its true. I don't deny it, so you shouldn't either.**

**Ignore the silly conversation within the class at the end...just...just ignore that...'Kay?**

**OH! And whats this? Utau has a little secret it seems. Is it good or bad? Or is it bad or good. Or is it bad good, good bad, bad bad, good good, good bad bad good?...WTF?**

**Anyways...**

**You know what I think is funny? That I can get at the very less six people a day to read my story. BUT only one or two will venture past the second chapter. LOVE IT! XD _**

**Questions, comments, concerns, haikus, or poems? Review and slash or PM me.**

**The answer to last times Question of the Day is... T-T ... Then I would say nothing. I would stare at them till they blinked, looked away, or walked away. As soon as they did either of those I would magical have a spoon in my hand (Hey, I'm a genie now!) and chuck it at them. Take it out of their flesh then...I won't go into detail...**

**Question of the Day (chapter)~ Why do you call it an asteroid when its outside the hemisphere, yet call it hemorrhoid when its in your ass?**

**HOPE YOU ALL ENJOYED (somewhat...a little? A tiny bit?) PLEASE REVIEW. IDEAS WELCOMED!**

**(i think i did pretty good re-re-revising it...)**


	5. Chapter 5

**Yo's! I was actually really surprised when I had a couple people review that they actually _laughed_ at the latest chapter. I thought it wasn't that funny, heck, I thought it wasn't funny at all. Ehhh... Whateva' floats ya boat is fine by me...**

**My friend (who is Chey in the story) was like (and these are her exact words...) "Da fuck is wrong with these people?" **

**If you found yourself offended at that in any way, shape, or form, please, do not fret. I slapped her over the head tenfold...**

**You know...we wonder how many brain cells she has left...she had so few to start out with... xP That was for the orange juice, Chey...*pouts, and crosses arms over chest* No one steals MY orange juice and gets away without being punished...meanie...**

**ANY WHOS! Thank-ie for everyone that has reviewed, alerted and favorited, and read my (our, but Chey manly gives me ideas through her stupidity)...I would name you all but I'm afraid you all would view me as a stalker...i don't want that...I love you all to much to let you find out my true motives...**

**(I hidez in yourz closetz.)**

**Have you noticed I like dots? ... (dot, dot, dot) .. (dot, dot) ... (dot, dot, dot, dot, dot) .. (dot, dot) :D**

**I am weird.**

**I am random.**

**I KNOW! XD**

**THATS ME!**

**And if you don't like that...**

**Your stuck with it...**

**So...**

**Deal with it.**

**Disclaimer: -_- ...I wouldn't be here, now would I?**

"Speaking"

'Thoughts.'

_**"When Utau and Chey say something at the same time."**_

_**"When the twins say something at the same time."**_

**"When someone speaks in a different language...This time it shall be English!"**

**~oOo(sWeEtNeSs)oOo~**

Several hours passed and the bell for lunch was about to ring. Time flew by for Chey until the end of third period, which was right before lunch. BUT she was having a terrific amount of fun toying with everyone who believed she was actually he. Truth be told it stung a tiny bit, but not enough for her to correct them.

Chey especially liked making random cows swoon. It was highly amusing. To watch those yellow buffalo drop like flies with a simple wink. Hell, even ignoring them seemed to work wonders.

It was a mystery.

These people were a mystery.

Rich people were a mystery.

Rich people were a confusing enjoyable mystery that tickled her funny bone, that much was true.

Chey noticed during her first period class that she already had a couple stalkers in auburn hair. _'They do look familiar...'_ - She thought as she zoned out the third period math teacher. It wasn't that she didn't understand anything. Oh no! In fact she found out she was ahead of everyone, so she figured she didn't need to listen if she already knew what was being taught, and perhaps more. But everyone thought he (SHE!) was slacking off. Which seemed to add more to his (HER!) list of charms that both genders seemed to be making. Didn't they have anything better to do? Oh wait...She forgot they came to school for fun...

The hell is that about?

'_I wonder if I know them...I'll ask Utau. She'll know. We go everywhere together and sense she doesn't forget..."_ And then, it struck her like a arrow being shot at the back of her head. Chey's eye grew wide when she finally realized something. Something that should of hit her when they got their schedules.

The fact the her and Utau were separated for the first time sense they first met almost seven years ago. Utau never left Chey's side after...the incident...She was taken in by her father after...that. She got use to the idea she wouldn't ever be able to shake the blond that attached herself to her very quickly after their very first meeting, and so she grew to live with it, use to it even.

Her father told her what happened to Utau. He told her she was to protect her, with her very life if necessary, but to treat like a normal person. Like what happened to her didn't ever happen. But to be very careful with her feelings. She was to fragile. She could brake easily.

Oh so easily.

Anyone would after going through something like that.

She viewed Utau as her precious little sister and closes and bestest friend. A little sister that could get so easily scared and hurt. And a best friend that relied on her to keep her darkest secrets, and Chey with her.

Chey balled the one hand that wasn't propping her head up.

_'What if she was being picked on?'_

She would kill who ever decided to bully Utau.

_'What if she was being ignored for being 'a lowly commoner,' ?'_

She would beat the crap at who ever ignored her.

_'What if some guy tries to flirt with her? Or...'_

...

Well shit...

...

Now she was really really REALLY worried for her friend.

So worried she started sweating bullets and her tan-ish skin paled drastically.

Everyone either looked at her strangely (out beloved twins, who haven't been seen lately, manly) or worriedly. Just as the teacher was about to ask her if she was okay the bell signaling lunch. Chey dashed out of the room quicker the lightning.

Faster then a blink of an eye.

And down the hall. Looking for Utau's class. It was then that she remembered something.

She hadn't the slightest clue were she was going.

_'DAMN IT ALL!'_ -She though while making a illegal U-turn, and running back to class to ask for directions to the third year hall.

Just as she was about to turn the very last corner she ran right smack-dab into someone. The force knocking both of them to the ground. But somewhere during the fall Chey maneuvered herself under the poor mystery person. Creating a cushion for the poor soul she crashed into.

As Chey hit the ground her eyes automatically closed tightly shut.

The position the two landed in was quite...uncomfortable, Chey found out as she opened her eyes, to say the less. Chey ended up falling almost complete on her back but her triceps supported some of her. She also found out she was holding onto the waist of the person she crashed into. Who, by the way, was straddling her.

And who meet the unfortunate fate to be the one on top? Why! It was none other then the fellow cross dresser, Doe Eyes... or was her name Haruhi?

_'That sounds about right.'_ - Chey thought, as she blinked away the slight fogginess from her vision, she must of found away to hit her head... '_Wait!...Da' fuck? How we get into this kind position?"_ - Chey then took the time to look around._ 'Hehe...so many people are blushing. Dirty thoughts. Dirty thoughts.'_ She then looked into the previously closed eyes of her straddler, Haruhi.

As soon as their eyes meet Haruhi's eyes widened, and she blushed very faintly, and scrambled to get up and apologized for not looking for were she was going.

"No it's my fau..." Chey tried to correct the girl but was soon interrupted by frantic yelling.

_**"Haruhi! Are you okay?"**_ -Chey's two twin stalkers yelled as they pushed her out of the way, making her land once more onto her butt, and shook Haruhi senselessly.

"We saw this monster push you!" One said with one hand on Haurhi's left shoulder and the other pointing at the pissed off transfer student who found herself on the floor for the second time in under a minute...

"Then we saw him try to molest and sexually abuse you! And in the hallway!" The other continued, one hand on Haruhi's other shoulder and the other pointing behind him as well to the fallen girl on the floor. Who just glared at their backs. Hoping they would melt under her gaze.

Feeling the glare the twins turned to glare right back at the new transfer student.

Chey wondered what her next move should be. Finally deciding not to physically hurt them (for she didn't want to get kicked out of this school too...and so soon) she was going to go with her second favorite chose.

Verbal.

But before anyone could say a thing a single name being called was heard in the curious, blushing, growing crowd of students that seemed to have been drawn...

"CHEY-NAY-NAY!"

And instantly Chey's face turned from frustration and pissed-off-ness to relief then happiness as her blond sister/best friend made her way to her. Through the Sea of Random Rich Kids, past the Twins of Utter Confusion and poor Haruhi, who was unresponsive an still dizzy from being shaken.

_'Poor girl, might of ended up with whiplash...or shaken baby syndrome...'_

As soon as she was a foot away from Chey (who was way too lazy to get off the floor) she jumped at her and hugged her around the neck. Giggling like a baby hyped up on crack, while rubbing their cheeks together in her strange form of greeting. Forcing Chey's right eye to close.

"Damn chicka, missed me much?" Chey laughed as she patted Utau's head. Everyone just stared at them with either interest or confusion on their faces or hearts in their eyes and or the blushes on their cheeks growing darker at the strange but friendly reunion.

Sitting back on her knees and resting her hands on them Utau replied with a huge smile on her face and said happily, "Nope."

Feigning hurt, Chey put her hands over her heart and fell backwards all the way onto the ground dramaticly, "OH! You wound me."

At that Utau laughed cutely. The pretty flowers of moe floating around her all the while.

Making everyone who wasn't blushing blush, and the ones who were, blush even harder.

Even Haruhi.

And the twins.

And even Kyoya and Tamaki, who decided to fallow Utau to find out more abut him... *coughcoughhercoughcough* and see if he would reconsider joining the host club.

...

Well then!

...*Insert sarcasm here*...Thats not stalkerish at all!

Chey began to laugh too as she sat up, that is, until she saw the onlookers. She was about to snap at everyone, asking what the hell they were looking at, but Utau began humming quietly, and rocking back and forth on her knees slowly. As if she was waiting for something as the two sat there, being starred at like monkeys at a local zoo.

Strike that and beat it with a stick...She was staring at Chey like that. To be honest it was starting to creep Chey out.

To have a blond who was staring SO intently at you like that.

Not blinking.

At all.

While rocking to-and-fro.

It was rather unsettling to say the very less.

All was quite for a goo 5 minutes (or so it seemed, it was really just thirty seconds) except the squeaking of Utau's shoes on the floor.

Eye brow quirking upwards Chey couldn't help but ask as she sweat dropped, "What the hell are you doing starting at me like that, butt-munch?"

At that Utau stopped rocking and narrowed her eyes at her BFFFL. She then reached over and smacked her upside the head.

"THE HELL WAS THAT FOR!" Chey yelled holding her head as she stood up, pointing to the girl still sitting on the ground.

"I'm hungry! It's lunch time! And guess who forgot to make out lunches!" Utau said calmly, yet with a slight scary tone to her voice. Making the crowd shiver un-pleasurably.

"Huh? It was my turn?...Wait...we take turns."

"No...it was Barney's turn...and yes...we do take turns." Utau replied deadpanned getting up and dusting herself off.

Seriously...they've alternated making lunches ever sense fourth grade, when they both got a bad case of food poisoning thanks to their grade school's cafeteria lunch ladies. They decided to be lazy bitches and not put the eggs for the next Brunch Wednesday into the fridge over the weekend...

**"...When did that start?"** Chey whispered in english to herself.

"..." Utau just stared at her, and the crowd at them. Who, by the way, ordered the maids and butlers that appeared from the walls to go get their expensive lunches, popcorn, over expensive chairs, and overly expensive, jeweled, opera glasses. Everyone was watching the two interesting specimen with interest.

Of courses, beside Haruhi and Kyoya.

Who were standing next to the sitting remanding members of the host club in the front. Yes they were interested in the idiots fanatics, but they weren't going to sit and watch. Who knows what could go wrong. And when things go wrong you don't want to sit their and get in the way. HELL NO! You want to be able to run as fast as you can in the opposite direction. Or see what destruction is caused and ring it up to be able to use to your own desires at will. After all, it all depends who you are.

Just then, after moments of silence, Utau hit Chey's forehead with the palm of her hand. And as Chey grasped at her forehead...Utau ran back in the direction she came from, knocking over the sitting twins and king and other random cows and blueberries in the process...

Laughing her ass off.

**"THE HELL WAS THAT FOR!"** Chey yelled, dashing off after her. Jumping over the fallen hosts.

Uatu looked over her shoulder and answered, **"COULD OF HAD A V-8!"**

Everyone who understood her sweat dropped.

Just as the two disappeared around the corner almost everyone broke out in high pitched screams and giggles.

Some guys included.

"Those two are weird."

"Yeah, but I think Chey is really cool! He also seems to be a bit protective of the Utau"

"Utau-kun in really cute, but he can be scary!"

Just then something dawned on the girls. Hearts appeared in some of their eyes, while other bit down on handkerchiefs and cried.

"JUST LIKE HONEY-SENPAI AND MORI-SENPAI!"

At that Kyoya began scribbling away in his note book and Tamaki had thoughts of re-assembling the now broken host club. Ever sense Mori and Honey senpai went to college they lost quite a few visitors and profit, and their makeshift family didn't feel the same. True, they tried to visit as often as they could, but college did take time away. Even for the rich and beautiful.

The girls then ran up the the host.

"Please tell us they will join the host club!"

"Oh please please please!"

Tamaki then struck a pose. "Of course, lovely princesses, they will join. For who can resist being around such lovely ladies, such as your selves? I will make it my duty and honor to bring to you two new hosts!"

At that the yellow cows jumped for joy.

The twins shared a devious smirk as they looked at each other.

Haruhi went back into the class room to eat her lunch.

And Kyoya? Well he was assessing the damage of course! Writing every little detail and round up the cost. Do you know how many opera glasses and chairs were broken when they ran away?

"HEY!" Karou yelled

"WHERE ARE OUR LUNCHES!" Hikaru finished.

**~Flashback~**

As Utau and Chey ran past the fallen people they each picked up a perfectly intact lunch on the way. Without being noticed.

**~End of short flashback~**

Guess who's lunch they stole.

**Well thats all for now! I gotta get this off the computer before my mom comes back in like...15 minutes and I gotta finish my stupid science thingy...**

**Sorry for anything that is spelled incorrectly. I'm am in a rush!**

**PLEASE REVIEW! Flames, anything! Flames keep me warm at night. No matter how mean they are!**

**If you have any funny or stupid ideas or experiences you wish to share and will allow me to use feel free to send them on in!**

**Any questions, comments, concerns, haikus, or poems? Review or PM me.**

**The answer to last times Question of the Day is...I have no fucking clue...I think they probably got the names confused at one point in time and were just to lazy to change it...**

**The answer to last times Question of the Day is... Can animals commit suicide?**

**Hope ya'll enjoyed now!**

**Love ya all!**

**Haters included!**

**Review! Tell me how I did and what I should do and slash or change!**


	6. Not a chapter

_*****IMPORTANT PLEASE READ AT LESS THE FIRST AND LAST COUPLE OF LINES.*****_

Dear Readers,

_**I will not be able to update any and ALL of my stories for a while.**_

_**Due to personal family matters**_. My mother's "boyfriend" or what ever the hell he was brought a stranger and drugs to our house early this morning as my cousin slept over. They got into it. She wanted him out and told him she was calling the cops. He beat her, making her land on my 11 month old sister, and waking up my cousin who tried to stop him. He went after her and beat her too. The stranger tried to stop him. Mom's "boyfriend" threw both their phones out of two, two paneled windows and into the yard.

My room's door was closed so I was more then likely forgotten. Thank God. I was the only one with a semi working phone. I called the cops who couldn't find us for 30 minutes. Thankfully the two left soon after my call.

The emotional toll is great. We have to get out of the house in 15 day. The bastard paid the bills, and cleared our bank accounts of money at a titty bar and on drugs. I also have to study for final exams and take care of my 11 year old and 11 month old little sisters as my mother attempts to work.

_**I apologize for any inconvenience but please try to understand that life has become all the more difficult for a kid who isn't even out of middle school yet and is starting to look for a job. This is not my choice, I have been forced to stop writing due to life being a bitch and transthericking bastards being transthericking bastards...KABLAH!**_

~Himawari


	7. Ch 6 Kira and the Death Note!

**YO! I am officially back and in action! XD **

**Well...At less for a little while... because I can see the future, you see, and well, what I see is THE END OF THE WORLD!**

**Nah...just messen with ya...what I see is MY (mom's) future. A terrible custody battle for my little sister. WHO! (by the way!) turned 1 on the 14th. HAPPY B-DAY CAL PAL! :P Hope you don't get stuck with your substance abuser, drunken none stop, sex offender of a father! XD**

**(We never new he was a sex offender till we went and searched PAST his 6 page rap sheet...yup...my mom sucks at picken men... T^T)**

**Kk...thats all I think...**

**ONWARDS AND FORWARDS! FORWARDS AND BACKWARDS! ON WITH THE STORY! TO AND FRO HERE WE GO!**

**(...wait...wtf...)**

Text.

"Speaking."

'_Thoughts.'_

"_**When Utau and Chey say something together."**_

"_**When my beloved twins say something."**_

"**English."**

**Warning: Rated M for language! And this was made with utter stupidity!**

**Disclaimer: I DO NOT own Ouran High School Host Club or ANY of it's characters. I simply use the characters for my own twisted amusement and personally satisfaction...but I do own Chey and Utau. XP Steal them you DIE!**

**American Idiots.**

**Chapter 6.**

**After School.**

**Hallway.**

"Green." Our long haired blond said randomly as herself and her companion walked down yet another long ass hallway. Said companion was sipping away at a strange fancy juice cartoon she "found" *coughcoughstolecoughcough* during lunch.

"Wait, what?" Chey starred at Utau like she finally snapped, crackled, _and_ popped.

"Green is a happy color."

"Well yeah, I know that! Its my fav color...what of it?"

Utau smiled and began talking in a sing song voice, "I was happy once till they put me in a round, round room."

"Oh Shit no," Chey starred wide eyed at her now officially crazy friend, "Damn it! Don't start that!

She was ignored.

"HEY! Balls are round! Balls?...Soccer balls! Soccer balls?...Footballs! Footballs?...EYEBALLS!"

"No! No! No! No! NO! Shut up! Shut up! SHUT UP!" Chey yelled as she cover her ears and shook her head rapidly.

"I can see with my eye balls. I can see...ah...ah...ah..." Utau looked from side to side as if in thought when she looked out the window and spotted something that caught her eye, "GRASS! Grass is green! Green is a Happy color."

"Please!" The fluffy haired one begged as she knelt on the floor and lowered her head in between her knees. "No more!"

"I was happy once till they put me in a round, round room," Utau sang cheerfully and smiled her dazzling, wicked smile. She took a breath to continue but before she could utter another sound a dark, menacing aura chilled the air and a hand was (once more) slapped over her mouth (and nose).

Her best friend glared evilly at her and growled.

"If you don't shut the hell up, I swear that I will..." Chey then bent towards Utau's ear and continued in a whisper only they could hear.

The blond's eyes grew (slightly) fearfully and wide. Chey pulled away, and took her hand off of Utau's face.

"Understood?"

Utau nodded and Chey to nodded and continued down the hall. A evil smile inched it's way onto Utau's face . Taking a very deep breath she began speaking very, very quickly.

"...GAH!" Utau yelled as she felt something whizz past her head.

Chey threw her juice box to silence the annoying blond. It hit the wall (some 10 feet) behind her. The bendy straw was imbedded into a painting mounted on said wall.

Slowly, the duo watched, the container slip off the straw and land onto a white vase with golden, embedded butterflies and flowers with diamond middles. The vase wiggled dangerously close to the edge of the table it was sitting peacefully on.

The duo froze, not sure weather or not to catch the expensive looking item of get the fuck out of there. Chey got ready to book it to the other end of the hallway and Utau got ready to make a killer dive. As both girls were about to make their move the vase stopped wiggling towards the edge.

The girls sighed in relief.

But! I guess they sighed a little to hard, or the vase just decided to screw with them, (it was more then likely the latter option...) for it seemed that the vase just jumped off the side of the table, hovered in the air for several seconds or more, and came crashing to the ground.

The girls mouths dropped in disbelief.

A chip of the vase flew through the air, past the head of Chey (slightly cutting her right cheek) and towards a mounted knight in shinning armor holding a sword (now where the fuck did that come from!) nocking it on the helmet, right smack dab in the middle of its forehead. It slowly fell backwards and fell into the window it was mounted in front of, and on to the fountain it was above. THUS! Smashing the peeing statue to smithereens.

The sounds of breaking glass, crumbling marble, and twisting metal could be heard throughout the hallway.

Chey and Utau starred dumbfounded at the crime scene, mouths wide open and on the floor.

"**What the hell!"** Chey reverted back ti her native tongue as she slowly began to turn her gaze towards Utau and glared.

"**T-That's impossible!"** Utau to sputtered in english as her mouth opened wide, in shock and confusion, at the mess but almost immediately shut it when she felt the murderous glare and intent directed at her. Just as Chey brought up both of her hands to ring the blond's neck, said blond took of screaming and and running.

No.

Sprinting.

Darn the long (pink) hallways...

"**Damn it! Look what you did you klutz! Get back here so I can wring that scrawny little neck of yours! You dumb ass!"**

"**NO!"** Utau yelled as she turned a corner. Her wanna be killer just steps behind her.

"**Then clean up that damn mess! It's your fucking fault!"** Chey growled out as she fallowed the poor blonde up a flight of stairs.

"**No it's your fault! You threw the juice with the mutant bend straw!"** They turned another corner.

"**You made me! You twit!" **Slightly pissed Utau yelled over her shoulder.

"**I haven't made you do shit!" **They drew near two double doors, unaware of what or who dwelled on the other side of it.

Chey was gaining on her friend, she was possible a little over an arms length away from the blonds neck. Who, was sweating bullets, she felt her demented friend's hands just inches away from her.

As soon as Chey tried to grab and lunge for her, Utau dived out of the way and

for the double doors in front of her. Grabbed the handles and yanked open the door. Chey, about a foot behind her, fell forward towards the door with a shocked expression. Utau turned around and grabbed the doors handle inside the room she just entered, getting a clear view of Chey's shocked-turned to-beyond pissed off face.

And with that she slammed the door.

Not even a second after the door closed, a loud 'thump' and a moaned 'ouch' was heard. Then all was quite. Utau, suddenly felling eyes on her slowly turned around to see a room full of those yellow bananas that plagued the school and a few familiar boys. Namely a pair of red headed twins.

'_Shit! Gingers!' _Utau thought as she pressed herself against the doors, panting heavily. Thinking quickly her eyes shot over everyone's faces, matching names and information to them.

"Ah! Well isn't it Utau! Remember me! We're in the same home room!" A blonde haired violet eyed boy, who she recognized as the chairmans son Tamaki, exclaimed as he ran up to Utau, took both of her hands in his, and leaned in super duper close to her face.

"Who would of thought you would be so openly gay!

'_Wait, what? Gay?...They still think I'm a dude! What the hell is wrong with these people!"_

Utau didn't get a chance to say a thing, her brain was so frazzled and overwhelmed with Tamaki rambling about what kind of guy he (SHE!) was into. The yellow banana cows didn't help either. They were squealing rather loudly and blushing unnaturally, but at the same time looking disappointed. She also noticed the Hitachiin Twin's glaring and smirking evilly at her.

'_WTF!' Utau thought as Tamaki rambled on._

"Well, who am I to judge you commoners?" Tamaki said as he let go of Utau's and struck a dramatic pose

"Um..Tamaki...senpai..where am I?"

"What! You mean to tell me you haven't heard about us!"

'_Hehe...yes..' _Utau Snikered in her head.

"No, I'm sorry, I haven't."

"Well then, Welcome to the Ouran High School Host Club!...Wait...Why aren't there rose petals falling?" Tamaki put a hand to his chin and looked up at the ceiling.

'_Is this guy high?'_

Just as Utau once again opened up her mouth in a attempt to speak, the sound of scratching on the door caught everyones attention. Serveral girls screamed and hid behind the host. The twins and Tamaki in turn hid behind a couch.

Utau stiffened, but stayed were she was near the door.

"U-U" A creepy voice seeped though the door and rang throughout the room and slithered it's way up everyone's spine

Everyone watched as Utau inched her way to the couch where Tamaki, Hikaru, and Kaoru were hiding behind and slowly sat down with them. Her back leaning on the back of it.

"I know your i there U-U."

Kaoru looked over at the new couch dweller who sat next to him. Apparently the other two hadn't noticed his (Her, damn it!) appearance.

"Hey." The youngest Hitachiin twin whispered. Utau turned her head to look at him with slightly fearful eyes. For some reason Kaoru found himself blushing slightly. "T-thats your friend out there...huh?"

At that the fear vanished from the long blond's eyes and was replaced with utter happiness. An almost inaudible giggle escaped her lips. A giggle only Kaoru could hear due to their close proximity. His blush slightly deepened. "You noticed, huh?"

"Why are you hiding from him?"

'_Again with the guy shit! This is getting depressing.' _Utau thought as she sweat dropped.

Again she giggled, "We're playing a game!"

The creepy voice of Chey again rang through out the room, "I know your in there, U-U."

"A creep ass game if you as me..." Utau continued as she turned her body around to look over the couch.

"Wanna burn the banana suits?" Chey's tone of voice changed from scary as hell to sickly sweat as she cracked the door open a few inches and allowed half of her face to peep in and look around for her friend.

Chey was sitting on the ground and scooted herself into the room

"H, E double L, O! I said, do you wanna burn the banana suits, U-U!" Chey's eyes held mischief...and...wait..what was that...fire? A small "yes" was heard from behind a couch placed by a oversized window, and a evil, Grinch like smile stretched its way across her face.

Utau once again peeked over the couch , only to come face to face with a fire breathing, creepy ass Chey.

"Heres Chucky!"

"I didn't break it!" Utau yelled as she jumped back and pointed at Chey, making the twins and the host club king cling to a overly confused Haruhi.

Before anyone could process what was going on the sound of a book slamming shut and footsteps heading towards the two new transfer students. Who both turned to look at the source. A dark haired handsome young man with glasses that hid his eyes and a black note book tucked under his arm, was walking towards them. He had on one of the mot fake smile Utau had ever seen It looked familiar and it sickened her and shut her up, and made her slightly cringe away.

Seeing her friend act that way Chey jumped over the couch and landed in front of Utau. Slightly blocking everyones view of her.

"Excuse me, but I couldn't help but over hear you confusion and I would like to ask," -hear the young man pushed up his glasses in a ominous way, opened up his note book, and got a pen ready, "What exactly did you to break?"

"And who the hell wants to know!" Chey snapped at the one who made her best friend act the way she did.

The young man opened his mouth to answer, or contiune questioning, but was cut of by another voice coming from behind Chey.

"Ootori Kyoya. Birthday, November 22, Good Wife Day. Current age, 18. Blood type, AB.

Nationality, Japanese and German." Utau recited as she stepped around a intrigued yet bored Chey and in front of a shocked Kyoya. Everyone else in the music room began to make their to listen to the now one sided conversation. "Older sister Fuyumi Ootori. Older brothers Yuuichi and Akito Ootori. Father, Ootori Yoshio. Head of the Ootori family. Relation ship? Rocky...unstable...none existent. He carries around a notebook that holds...things...I am not at liberty to tell. Member and true manager of the, infamous, Ouran High School Host Club. Where handsome young men with way to much time on there hands, cater to the needs of beautiful young women, also with way to much time on their hands. Excellent computer skills. Brilliant hacker.

Everyone starred dumbfounded at the long haired blond. But her friend just starred at the now closed notebook. She suddenly pointed at said notebook and its holder.

"I bet he's Kira, and that notebook there is the Death Note. Thats why you are not at liberty to tell what it contains!"

**We can only wish that a Death Note existed!...*insert evil smirk here***

**Anyways...hope ya'll enjoyed...please review...**

**HEY! I would like at a minimum of 4 reviewers please! I need support and I don;t feel the love! I know there are people reading, alerting, and favoring this story. I know your there. I'll name you all and hunt you down ya know!**

**Please! review! My confidence had been low for the past...how long has it been? A month?**


	8. Ch 7 Wow

**I AM SO SORRY THAT I HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO UPDATE! Court sucks! It keeps you in your car nonstop!**

**By the by...the bastard doesn't get to have unsupervised visits with my baby sister anymore! *evil laughter here* **

**Warning! Warning!: This chapter can and WILL contain some Justine Bieber and Twilight bashing. JB Edward fans continue at your own risk or don't continue at all and wait for the next chapter. Remember, this warning is for _my_ own safety. **

"Speaking."

'_Thoughts.'_

"_**When Utau and Chey say something at the same time."**_

'_When Utau and Chey think something at the same time.'_

"_**When my twins say something at the same time."**_

"**English!"**

**American Idiots.**

**Chapter 7.**

"Sadly, it's not a Death Note Chey-nay~nay." Utau sighed dramatically.

"Awww...I was gonna take it." Chey smirked as she still eyed Kyoya's notebook, which was slowly tucked out of her line of sight. '_Damn.' _Chey thought as her smirk died.

"Amazing!" The blond haired, purple eyed young man exclaimed and ran over to the two new students, who struck weird poses of fear when they heard the sudden shout.

"How did you know so much about Kyoya?" The young man grabbed Utau's hand (once more) and leaned very close to her face (once more) with awe filled eyes.

Utau's wide eyes were covered by her hair. Shielding them from everyone else in the room. Besides Chey. Who yanked Utau away from the overly excited blond (_'Shit another one!'_) and then grabbed the violet eyed blond's hands and held them slightly above his head.

"Don't. Touch. _Her._" Chey spit out and glared at the shivering, ghostly white, Tamaki. Who nodded rapidly.

Several, silent moments passed as everyone took in what the dark green eyed commoner said.

"Uh? Her?" Mostly everyone in the room said in unison as they tilted their heads comically.

"Awwww! Nay~Nay! You ruined my new game already!" Utau crossed her arms over her chest, and puffed out a single cheek in a pout. Everyone blushed.

"W-w-what? Your a girl!" All the females in the room (minus one!) cried out at the same time. Waterfall tears streaming down there faces, some of the yellow cows bit down on handkerchiefs.

The twins shared a sly grin after they got over their 5 seconds of shock.

Chey and Utau just stared at the yellow cows antics...

'_How do they all do that!' _The two briefly thought as the looked at each other.

The long haired blond _girl_ then pointed sideways to her friend while turning her head to looking at the over reacting rich people.

"Chey~nay~nay is a girl too! 100 percent baby making material! 100 percent Female on the outside...possibly 50 percent on the inside!"

Chey looked at the blond with a raised eyebrow. "How the fuck does that work?

Utau shrugged, "IDK...I just thought of it. But it is true...if you think about it really really _really_ hard." Chey frowned deeply in concentration. Utau saw this from the corner of her eye and put a hand on Chey's upper arm and looked up at her in worry.

"**But don't think about to hard, Nay-nay...it makes you look constipated." **

Silence filled the room.

Chey flicked her blond friend on the forehead, **"Bitch..." **

"**I LOVE YOU TOO!" **Utau smiled stupidly as she rubbed her forehead.

The twins then took the time to slide up behind the two, know now as, females, and each place a arm around one of the girl shoulders. Hikaru had a arm around Chey, (who looked like she was about to take a bite out of his hand ) and Kaoru had a arm around Utau (who tensed at the contact).

"So if your both girls," Karou started.

"Why are you wearing those," His twin finished as they both pulled at the girls clothing.

"_**And not the girls uniform?"**_

The air chilled as the two girls turned their faces to look at the twins, hair covering the eye that wasn't facing them.

"_**Because it will make us look like fucking yellow bananas." **_The two stated darkly as they pried the Hitachiin Twins arms off of them.

"Or yellow cows," Chey came out of the dark stupor and place a single finger on her chin as she look up at the ceiling in thought.

"Or banana squash." Utau added with a smile. The flowers of moe stupidly falling behind her.

"The point is," Utau shrugged and continued as she spotted Chey look at her strangely, for what was more then likely around the hundredth time that day.

"We would never," Chey said as she placed her hands behind her head, and leaned back lazily.

"**_Be caught _dead_ wearing something so hideous,"_**

"So atrocious," Utau spat, crossing her arms.

"And frilly," Her short haired companion added.

"_**Even if it was required of us, or you paid us, we would never wear it." **_The girls shook their heads.

"But the male uniform on the other hand," Utau looked at the uniforms the twins had on.

"We can stand," Chey too looked at the uniforms.

"_**Even if it would make us look like blueberries." **_The two sighed.

"We can live in those."

"And I absolutely love blueberries!" Utau jumped up and down with joy as she clapped quickly.

"But as for the clothes we have on now." Chey said as she took a single arm out from behind her head and tugged on Utau's hoodie.

"Their Nay-nay's norm!" Utau said while trying to look and stop the fluffy haired girl who wouldn't cease the tugging on the hoodie. "The airline lost _ALL _my baggage that contained my clothing, so I'm wearing hers." Utau spun freeing herself when she said '_all'_.

"Yeah but," Hikaru said.

"_**They make you look like guys."**_

Everyone watched as Utau did a perfect imitation of Tamaki's emo corner. Chey just about fell onto the floor from her laid back position, and starred in fear at the now mumbling blond.

Utau began to rock back and froth on her heels as she looked at the wall with wide, glazed eyes. **"That's insulting...just...just insulting. You don't look like a dude, Utau. No, no. You look feminine. Female. Female. Female."**

Chey pointed at the twins dramatically and began to yell at them, amusement and fear in her eyes, "Damn it you two!" The twins jumped back and hugged each other in fear as they starred at the fingure that was dangerously close to them. "You put her in her damn depression corner!" Chey scratched madly at her head, messing up and tangling her short hair. "Damn it to hell! How am I to get her out of it!"

She looked worriedly at her friend, who began drawing patterns with her finger on the dark wall as she continued to reassure herself. **"No one can mistake you as a guy, no one..."**

Chey slowly slinked around a pillar that was oh so conveniently placed five steps to her right. "Hide your asses everyone..." She whispered. Everyone scurried to hide behind tables and couches. Or stood behind them, if you where Haruhi or Kyoya.

Utau suddenly stood up, clutching her hair and yelling to herself.** "Everyone already believed you where a guy! Do I really look and sound like a guy? NO you don't! Come on now!" **The girl began to pace back and froth quickly while spinning her hands around each other as she spoke to herself in he native tongue. **"Who the hell in their right mind would think you were a guy..."** Utau stopped pacing and slammed her right hand, which was balled into a fist, onto her left palm. **"Thats it! No one's in their right mind! Everyones a fucking idiot at this school!"**

Everyone who understood her either had a look of anger (the twins, Kyoya, but you couldn't really tell, and a few girls), shock and depression, (Tamaki more then half of the girls), or utter confusion, (Haruhi and a handfull of girls) on their faces.

Chey had a extremely hard time muffling her laughter with her hand. Her friend continued her pacing and talking.

"**I mean thats got to be it...What other explanations are there? Your voice is to high to be a guys. Unless that guy hadn't hit puberty yet..." **The look of realization slapped it's self onto Utau's face

"Shit! She's gone!" Chey almost yelled.

"**They think I'm like Justin Bieber!" **Utau screamed in horror. She went back to her corner of woe and rocked back and forth to mumble nonsense to the wall. All the while her friend fell onto to floor in a violent fit of laughter.

A few minutes of insane laughter later, Chey got up off the floor, dusted her self off, and coughed into her fist to calm herself down. Taking a deep breath she yelled something that was sure to get her blonde friends mind off the being mistaken as a boy issue.

"**YO! U-U!"**

The girl turned her head to look at her friend, eyes big and full of unshed tears.

"**EDWARD CULLEN!"**

Immediately annoyance and anger replaced depression as Utau stood and pointed at Chey, **"Vampires don't sparkle!"**

Chey's hands shot into the air in victory. "And she's back!"

Utau, still pointing at Chey, continued. "I bet if he sneezed, glitter would come out!"

Just as Haruhi opened her mouth to ask what was going on the sound of a classical ringtone interrupted her.

Utau froze and Chey dug around in her pockets (all six of them) and pulled out the phone that cause the nose.

"Shit we're late for work!"

And faster then anyone could blink the more emo of the two (Nay~nay) grabbed the smallest (Utau) by the wrist and booked it.

"Well that was..." Kaoru began.

"Interesting?" Hikaru questioned, as everyone stared at the doors, the host clubs costumers slowly leaving the room as they would any other normal day at the club. Chattering loudly about what occurred moments ago.

Haruhi sweat dropped. "I guess you can say that."

**Personally...I think that this chapter was sort of a fail, at the very less the ending was... My journal is once more lost in storage... Gosh I hate moving... TT_TT**

**Heartnett~ Yes. This...crap...is really happening to my family and I. *sighs* How sad is it that I am...well...use to this kind of thing? Lol. I'm glad think this is awesome. YO! Don't die in a pool of acid! Here, here is a a new chappy! *whimpers* Please don't kill me.**

**HitaAnsUtaPri~ *rubs head sheepishly* Sorry that my personality scares you. *laughs* Utau is based off of my personality, not my smarts. *crys* My friend, who Chey is based off of, is 100% like the Chey you have been reading about in this story. But to calm her down I smack her over the head. :) Gotta love our relation ship.**

**...You two...You two our my favorites. :) Your comments allways make my crappy ass days less crappy and full of smiles, sunshine, and blushes.**

**Kimimaro Of The Rock. D: May your pet rest in peace. I know bugs can commit suicide...I once watched a beetle repeatedly run into my window till it died...I laughed so hard. Then I felt bad, so I buried it in my flower pot. :)**

**RougeBlaze3. DAW! Thank you! At less I'm good at one thing... **

**And too everyone else who reviewed. *Bows low* Thank you! My self-esteem has almost been ...diminished sense school ended...DAMN YOU REPORT CARD! *shakes fist at air***

**KK...Had to do that. To lazy to use IM...sorry :P**

**Four more reviews till next update...kk? :) We can do that again right?**


	9. Chapter 8 Migraine Worthy

**Hey...I'm back...somewhat...Sorry I haven't been updating. Life and the first year of high school...*sarcasm* Yeah!...**

**I thought I should make this clear, just because I can...But Chey and Utau are based off of myself and my friend. Some events in this story have happened to us. Minus the obvious and some major...depressing parts...Mainly the funny, you-dumbass! moments.**

"Speaking."

_'Thoughts.'_

_**"When Utau and Chey say something at the same time."**_

_'When Utau and Chey think something at the same time.'_

**_"When my lovely twins say something at the same time."_**

**"English!"**

**American Idiots.**

**Chapter 8**

It was dark in apartment 3B, the room at the end of the walk way on the top floor, of the three story complex. Boxes cluttered the two roomed, one and a half bath apartment. Slowly the door knob of the front door turned. Breaking the deadening silence with its creepy creaking.

The fluffy black haired girl stumbled in hunched over and slightly dragging her friend, who, by the by, was currently passed out over her right shoulder...

It was a long day...

Chey closed the door with her foot and stood still for several seconds, staring at the wall to her left with half lidded, heavy eyes. After a few moments of calming down heavy breathing she sighed deeply, straightened up, and released Utau. Allowing her to fall like a ton of lead to the ground.

She landed with a thud.

Moaning Utau rolled onto her side to see a emotionless (tired as HELL!) Chey starring down at her. Glaring up at her friend the blond slowly, and unnoticed, snaked her hand across the short distance towards Chey's ankle, and pulled.

Hard.

She, too, landed with a thud.

Needless to say they were both wide awake and pissed.

The two friends glared at each other.

Then, as one, wild grins stretched across their faces and laughter filled the previously tense air, lightening it.

**"You should of seen the look on you face!"** Utau said through the brief pause of her laughter as she rolled all over the floor. **"You were all like..."** Utau suddenly ceased her laughing and rolling and face her struggling-to-stop-laughing best friend with a seriously board, tired, look. Chey's hysterical laughter was reduced to barely contained giggles when she laid eyes on the blond. Soon all sounds stopped and Chey worriedly reached a hand out to poke her friends forehead.

**"Dude...Ya'll alright?"**

A smile was all she received before, **"Thats what you looked like!"**

Silence once more occupied the room before laughter (once more!) kicked it out the window and tied it to the light post in front of the complex.

The duo got up, giggling all the way.

**"Work sucks!"** Chey exclaimed she plopped herself down onto a chair in the kitchen, Utau skipping to the stove to make so tea. Humming her annoying tune the whole way to the stove

**"Why the hell do we have to wear these stupid outfits anyway!"** She gestured to what the two were wearing...

Black and white...frilly...maid outfits...

In other words...

Dresses.

...

**"I don't like it either, but its good pay! *Don'tcha know!"** Utau giggled

**"...Yea...I guess your right...but seriously!"**

The two sighed.

_**"A Maid Cafe."**_

**"Oh! The guys back home would NEVER let that go if the found out!"** Chey moaned pitifully into her hands as Utau placed the tea on the table.

**"Oh! I know right! They'd laugh for days! Nah!...The wouldn't do that...They's laugh themselves to the grave!"** Utau giggled, and sipped her tea.

**"Not funny U-U."** Chey said in monotonely **(A/N I know..not a real word..deal with it.)** and grabbed her cup.

**"Of course it is! Nay~Nay!"**

Chey just shook her head, and raised her glass, just as her lips touched the cup the phone rang.

**"Seriously? At this time of night?" "Who the hell?"** Both girls said, and looked at each other, and together got up and went for the landline on the kitchen wall.

Chey picked up the phone.

**"Yo..."**

A shaky, and stressed male voice floated from the phone, **"Fifty...thousand...Fifty THOUSAND dollars! AND IN ONE DAMN DAY"**

Chey starred at the phone as the voice panted after screaming the random amount of money before screaming into the mouth piece,**"...WHO THE BLOODY FUCKING HELL IS THIS!"**

**"DON'T SPEAK TO YOUR FATHER LIKE THAT YOUNG LADY!"**

The two girls looked at the phone in shock.

**"...Daddy?"** _'What the hell did I do this time?'_ Chey thought.

_'What the hell did she do this time?_' Utau thought as she starred at Chey with pity, and mirth.

"Don't you daddy me! Do you know how much trouble you both are in this time!"

**"Both?"** Utau asked.

_**"Wait...What?"**_

The girls looked at each other, and shrugged. They had no clue.

_**"No. What we do this time?"**_

**"Y-you don't, for the love of! Break anything expensive lately?"**

...

**"Maaaaaybe..."**

A deep sigh came from the phone. **"You two owe the school $50,000"**

Silence got free from its bindings and lamppost prison and filled the air.

**"I'm sorry,"** Utau started.

**"But we're afraid you have the wrong number,"** Chey continued, and dropped off.

**"Please,"** Utau said kindly.

**"Try again after the beep"**

**_"Beeeeeep"_** The two said together.

**"Wait just a...!"** Chey hung up the phone and walked away as the blond began to mumble...

**"Fifty...fifty thousand...how many hundreds are in a thousand? OH!...I'm going to bed!"**

* * *

><p>Chapter 7 replies to comments (cause Im to lazy to PM):<p>

angel2u- Lol. Awww, thanks!

HitaAndUtaPri- LMAFO! XD I shout/do weird random stuff all the time! Glad you liked it.

Guest- Thanks. I really do appreciate it. Its weird. On the Mac (the computer that is out for my life! The damn thing...) we have spell check, but on MY little HP Mini thingy I don't have spellcheck...anywhere...not on YT, FF, or Word...nothing...plus I can't spell to save my life...

Heartnett- Nah, thanks, but I'm not looking for comfort (just want the bastard in jail but...) O.o hope you don't mind me asking but, why where you ready to cry? NO! Don't stab yourself!

Midnightsun1397- Lol! Since Utau and Chey is my friend and I that must mean we have twins! XD...or doublegangers...o.o

Oh! And if you can tell me where ***Don'tcha know!** comes from I'll give you a virtual cookie!

Question on the day (or week, or month...):

If a cat always lands on its feet, and buttered bread always lands butter side down, what would happen if you tied buttered bread on top of a cat


	10. Revising Sorry!

Sorry! This is not an update! I am simply modifying this story. I have revised my chapters and cringed...so I am changing a few things that I deem worthless.

Thank you, Iz-Insane, for you criticism. This story needed it.

Sorry again.

But will have an actually chapter up soon.


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